[Pan across cityscape of Downtown Dallas. Fade out and flash to text.]
From the Creative minds behind Violate Immigrants...
[Fade in to aerial view of North Dallas, zoom in towards LBJ Freeway, scene of cars zipping by Open Connect building. Fade out and flash to text.]
A Riving Loom Games Production...
[Scene from an MIS Department... Woodchuck is tearing the 980 apart, Damon is tearing his hair out debugging CIS, Scot is tearing into various company vice-presidents, Scott is tearing through the Meridian manuals, Tico is tearing through web-sites, and Kent is asleep on the couch in the lobby. Fade out, flash to text.]
Wrath Of Conception. Coming one of these days to a web page near you.
Joe: Welcome back to our pre-game show.
Jojo: MmmphmmmphhmmmphMojoJojommmmph!
Joseph: We had to tie Jojo up and gag him for a little while. The 50 cc's of methotrimeprazine should be kicking in soon though, and then we can let him play with us again.
Jojo: Mmmphmmmphmmmmmmmmmm...
Joe: And it appears that the contestants have started to arrive through the arena doors. It's still early, but we always expect people to arrive prior to the meeting. Coming in now in rapid succession are Aaron "Scavenger Bob" Robb who we'll be referring to as Philo, and Supersleeper Kent Raymond. Oh, and surprises of surprises, El Presidente has also arrived. Looks like you lost that bet, huh Joseph?
*Joseph is in the back of the room, grumbling to himself as he pays off his debtors*
Joe: Looks like he'll be busy for a little bit. While he's doing that, let's take a look at today's agenda that was sent out by El Presidente' himself:
Old Business:
LRG Original Game Team: Damon
Earthdawn 2 Team: Woodchuck
Art? Cover?
Editing
Layout
Deadline
Earthdawn 2 Companion Team: Woodchuck
Art? Cover?
Deadline
Webmaster: Damon
Financial: Philo
How's PoD doing?
Marketing: That Marketing Guy
Earthdawn Line Developer: Woodchuck
Con-related stuff
President: Lotus
New Business
Open
Joe: And there it is folks. It's tiny, but it's better than this team has seen for the past few meetings now. And looks like Joseph is back too. How'd it go?
Joseph: It sucked.
Joe: Well said! Do you have any other... predictions for us today?
Joseph: Hmm, 10 bucks says Damon Earley and Austin Mills will be the next people through that door.
Joe: Oh ho! What sport. Let's see if Joseph can make some of that money back! And there's the door... It's Damon! And... Aaron Johnson. Well, this is an interesting dilemma. Looks like you're only half right there, Joseph.
Joseph: Hmph. That counts as breaking even.
Joe: Anyway, it appears that quorom has been met. The contestants are still talking about video games though.
Joseph: Not surprising.
Joe: No matter. It looks like the Sotos and Austin have arrived as well. If they weren't ready to start before, they should be now. Almost right on time too, it's 7:30.
Joseph: You say they're ready. Aaron Johnson is still talking about some novels he's read.
Joe: No, looks like El Presidente has pulled out his own big stick and has called the meeting to order. Mike is the first person to step forward, to present news about con stuff.
Mike: We have three other game companies interested in joining us in the How to Publish a Game panel: Anoch, Evil Polish Brothers...
Joe: There seems to be a lot of side chatter during this...
Joseph: It always happens.
Mike: ... and Mark Arsenault with the Gold Rush games, who is the most experienced of those in the group already. Heliograph had to back out because they had too much on their plate.
Joe: While the players are discussing people no one else ever really dealt with, let's take a look at the playing field. Mike is sitting in his usual seat of power, while the two infected with the plague have secluded themselves in a corner away from the rest of the group. The Sotos have cuddled up together on the sofa, while Kent is fighting off sleep as that evil sofa drains his will for wakefulness. Aaron Johnson is eating and editing and talking at the same time; talk about multitasking to the extreme! Aaron Robb appears to have his attention divided all over the place with D&D, Earthdawn and the meeting.
Mike: Andon, who runs Origins and GenCon, needs commitments for running programs at the convention. We'll need 8 titles and 8 blurbs for the program booklet.
Joe: It looks like the players are discussing stretegy on how to accomplish this goal. It seems like a complicated plan, but they've managed to pull it off before. Do you think the have a chance?
Joseph: They're pretty talented when it comes to pulling things out of their butt. You can be sure they've got more stuffed up there.
Joe: What the heck is that supposed to mean?
Joseph: Umm, never mind.
Mike: My next con report is for Uncommoncon. SUPPOSEDLY, adventures are being written for them.
Damon: You'll have an adventure written by Monday!
Jason: You'll have TWO ready by Monday!
Joe: Ohhh, two promises for adventures! These guys are being bold today!
Joseph: You're one to talk.
Joe: Shhhh! Quiet! Don't even mention that. *cough* Anyway, everyone is discussing what was supposed to be written by whom and how. It's a lot of logistical stuff that most people don't particularly care about. Oh, looks like they're talking about vampires... or something. Something about a left turn at Albequerque... I'm not sure I get what's going on.
Aaron "Eb": I only have a few more sections to edit for the main book!
Joe: Oh, something important... and I missed some of it.
Jason: Looks like 2nd Ed is going to be one of the most playtested games in a long time.
Mike: With Eb almost done, we -might- be able to make it out by February, but most likely, it'll be out by March. It'll definitely be out in first quarter.
Eb: *Ranting something about hard-to-interpret writing...*
Joe: I'm surprised that there's been more ranting from our Editor than Damon. That's really going to hurt Damon's reputation.
Mike: Marco's editing is proceeding at about the same pace as Eb's editing. Even if Eb turns in the rest of the book tomorrow, Marco would not be able to finish for another week. We still need to put in the playtesting changes.
Philo: Quick question about playtesting changes. Where are you [Mike] in checking over the book for the changes that need to be made.
Mike: I have a list of all the changes that need to be made. I'm going down and checking off the list as changes are being made. We -have- to print at least one copy of the book to...
Jason: At least four!
Joe: Dang, I hope they don't expect my printer to be used exclusively for this!
Mike: ... so that we can go over the book to catch anything that we might have missed. We can hope that we have the book by December so that we can all look over it to be sent first thing January.
Philo: Can Patterson guarantee a 6-week print time?
Shirley: They can, buuuut...
Jason: No printers can make any such guarantee...
Joe: Aaaaahhh, too much talking. Losing... track... of conversations...
Marco: I'll kick Brian around to make sure the cover is ready on time.
Joe: There is a lot of talk going on around about art for the 2nd Edition book, artists and such.
Mike: Companion, one month late and counting... *glare*
Joe: Eep.
Joseph: Ha ha!
Mike: Every once in a while, I have this dream...
Philo: Oh, the four products a year dream. Yeah, I've had that dream.
Mike: It's a three products a year dream now... The way we're doing things now, we're always running. Part of that dream is to have something actually finished before the week it's due to be sent to the printers...
Damon: Living Room Games; if you take the first letters of each word and add in some ass, then we have largesse.
Joe: There he goes. His reputation won't be soiled that easily.
Mike: We'll almost certainly have three products for 2001. Maybe... In any case, I don't think that we'll be able to support more than one product. Unless someone can actually go fulltime, we can't hope to possibly have any time to work on multiple products.
Joe: Marco takes his turn and throws out a couple of his dreams as well. Ow! And the room busts out on Marco for making some pretty tall promises...
Jason: Hopefully, before I'm 30, I'm going to open my own game store.
Joe: Wow, lots of dreams being shared tonight.
Joseph: So what does this have to do with the meeting?
Joe: I'm not really sure, but it's giving me time to catch up with my writing.
Joseph: You're still missing half the stuff.
Joe: Shut up, I'm going as quickly as my fingers will let me. They're talking about reading comic books, and Earthdawn becoming a top ten product...
Jason: ... Posters are tough to work with, the fewer you print, the more it costs, etc, etc...
Joe: And more important stuff that came up when I wasn't paying attention. At least we covered this last meeting...
Austin: If we're going to do promotional items, we can do t-shirts instead. There's a company that you can send an image to, and they'll print the t-shirts, and sell it for you as well. There's a flat rate which they get. And they do more than t-shirts. It looks like a great thing to look into.
Philo: (To Jason) Can you check on the prices of posters and poster mailing tubes?
Joe: While they're talking about multiple marriages and games, I think those T-shirts are a better idea than posters. The less we have to actually do, the better. They're also bantering about ideas about ignoring customs and punishing naughty distributors. There's a viable volume of vicious verbage volleying about.
Joseph: Hey, that was pretty good.
Joe: Thanks. I thought so myself.
Philo: If they don't pay us soon, I'll have to get nasty. We'll just let our people know, and he can stop all shipments to them from our guys. Also blacklist them with other companies.
Mike: Speaking of checks, we did get some.
Joe: Oh, and the Money Man Aaron "Philo" Robb starts tossing out numbers at an incredibly devastating rate. Some of those decimal points are wreaking havoc on the delicate minds of the writers. Even I'm starting to feel dizzy.
Joseph: It's his most effective attack. While everyone is stunned, he goes after their food.
Joe: Can't argue with that one, Joseph. He seems to be winding down, though, and life is beginning to shine once again in the other contestants' eyes.
Kent: Bert wanted me to also bring up the fact that there is something we will need to start worrying about come the first of December...
Jason: We can talk about that next.
Joe: And Philo begins his barrage of facts and figures anew. The members reel and... Ohhhhh! It looks like that last shot took the remaining will to remain conscious from Kent. His head is lilting to the side and he looks like he's down for the count.
Marco: Living Room Games will get you laid...
Joe: Hey, where did that comment come from?
Joseph: You don't want to know.
Joe: Erm, yeah. Anyway, it looks like Philo is looking up some more numbers.
Philo: Blahblahchecksblahblahblahdebtsblahblahblahmoneyblahblah
Joe: My.. my hearing! It's gone! Those numbers have ruptured my eardrums! What a merciless spiel!
Joseph: Stop shouting. Your hearing is fine. You're just spacing out and not paying attention again.
Joe: ... Oh.
Mike: We should be getting the receipts for the table.
Jason: Some of us may also want to consider joining the Academy of Adventure Gaming Arts and Design. I will bring copies of the application next time.
Joe: On the side, our accountant has also commented that he will need to go back to running numbers...
Joseph: Sounds like my kind of guy.
Joe: Shush. Aaron delivers a few more reports, talks a bit more about receipts and product breakdowns. This isn't the kind of thing that mundane ears should hear. It could corrupt them irreversibly.
Mike: What about the One-sheets?
The Marketing Guy: Uhhh....
Mike: Someone said they were going to send Joe a list of email addresses.
Jason: I have the contact info I need to get the list. I'll work on that.
Mike: If all else fails, there are other lists of retailers.
Marco: And the Living Room Games page has a list of retailers also...
Damon: *Holds up three fingers* Editor's note: Four now! Whoo!
Mike: Anyway, it should be done.
Joe: Thankfully, they're now deep into a conversation about relationships. I have time to catch up here.
Shirley: We can probably have a banner ready before GAMA
Joseph: Hey, what happened to the conversation that led up to this?
Joe: I lost track of everything. I don't know when they started back on track again.
Jason: Webmonkey, anything you have to share with us?
Damon: I hate you all.
Everyone: ???
Damon: Has anyone looked at the page recently? Like as of the second?
Philo: I think I did... What did you do to it?
Damon: Nothing! Really. Except that I changed Barsaive at War's release date to: November, dammit.
Damon: And, on another note, if you even think that you're sending me too much information in email, send it anyway. The last couple of messages were like, 'Damon! The Software! In Paris.'
Everyone: ???
Joe: Well, at least it looks like he's back in his groove.
Jason: What about That Marketing Guy? Have you got anything to announce?
That Marketing Guy: Well, I'm looking into a possible connection in Malaysia.
Joseph: That sounded a lot more malicious and underhanded when spoken aloud.
Joe: I can't reproduce that tone in text. Anyway, while everyone is talking about webpages and Germans, I'm catching up here... One important thing to note though, it looks like Philo is at war with France.
Mike: Does anyone have a point-of-contact with Crunchy Frog? We should get with them, and go out for pizza or something! They should hopefully be at Uncommoncon. They are local and all.
Joe: Phew. Fortunately, the conversation gets sidetracked pretty often. You don't know how hard it is to catch up with typing all of this. I don't know how secretaries do this. I hold a lot of respect for them now.
Joseph: I bet you'd like to hold a lot more than just that.
Joe: ...
Joseph: What?
Joe: Never mind. Uhh, cocaine eating rats? I'm not sure what's being discussed right now, but I think I'm glad I'm not paying attention. Anyway, back to the meeting...
Jason: I really don't have a lot to report that I haven't brought up here and there. Any new business? Anyone?
Damon: I do have one question... Since The LRG Original Product has been put on the side, and editing is sort of on hold, what do we do with the sidebars? Are they hard to put together?
Joseph: I say they can just make four columns and pretend the outer two are the sidebars.
Joe: We've been censored at this point. They're not allowing us to put in anything about this top secret project that everyone pretty much knows about already anyway. I hope that it doesn't get canceled though, if only for one thing: Jazz.
Joseph: You don't mean...?
Joe: Yes, exactly. We have to hope that there are enough fans out there curious enough to bug these guys to keep working on it. More talking, something about novels and other sidebar comments, but it's nine o'clock, and the meeting is now adjourned. It looks like you lost the bet about Kent getting taken out by the sofa too. See you next time, folks.
*Joseph is openly weeping, handing out the remainder of his money in the background as the credits roll.*
Earthdawn is a registered trademark of FASA Corporation. Used under license. © 2000 FASA Corporation. All rights reserved.